Randomness

My life is getting better.

I admire resilient people.  Those who can love and just walk away.  Those who can just forget and not remember.  I am not that person.  And I hate when others project their views onto me just b/c I don't see things the way they do.

I need a new vibrator.  This morning was pathetic but it got the job done.  Made the day bearable.  My flesh has been threatening to take matters into it's own hand.

He was a blessing sent.  I was honored to be his chosen.  I don't think I articulated that enough in our time together.

At times, I am remembering the past way better then it was.

Talked to an old college fling today.  Unhappiness is rampant, or we live in this world that is terribly unselfish.  To sacrifice happiness seems to be a natural reaction.  Prayers to him, I hope he gets through this soon.

My tears water the flowers in my life garden.  Creator, hear my prayer(s).

I have to stop being prideful.  Everything I take so much pride in is taken from me; my car, Alex and if I don't get a grip on it soon my job.  Creator, hear my prayer.

That small voice is at it again, telling me that him and I are not completely finished.  So I pray for the wisdom to maintain our relationship (my part), the strength to endure this time apart and for the blessing itself.  Breathe.

Far away from here.....can I get a window seat?

I think about the day I met the perfect stranger.....

This separation is necessary for the both of us.  Whatever is going on in his life is part of his walk and vice versa.  That still doesn't ease the pain.  I'm trying but at times I feel like I'm dying.  I don't know what's coming over me.  Creator hear my prayer.

I'm learning to breathe again! I'm learning to live again! I'm making myself smile & putting me back together again!

Blessings are coming.  I know that not every setback is the enemy's work, there is always divine intervention.  If it wasn't God's will then he will NOT let it continue.  He will purposely close a door b/c it's not his will.  This thing with Alex could be God protecting me or sending someone into my life to heal me.  I need to have more faith in God's interruptions, it's not all about me and what I want.  The reason for this is because God has something bigger and better for me.  Can't WAIT to get there.

*power down*